The Unexpected Openness of YTT 🌸
One of the most surprising aspects of YTT has been the openness of the group—almost immediately. I suppose it makes sense when you’re surrounded by yogis who are each trying to dig deeper into their practice, and therefore, themselves.
Still, I’m pleasantly surprised by how this beautifully diverse group of all ages, genders, and backgrounds came together so quickly, each of us in our own season of transition. Many of us aren’t currently working or have just moved to Austin, and somehow that shared space of uncertainty has made room for something genuine—connection without pretense.
The next prominent distinction is the respect for one another’s individual journey. It’s deeply refreshing to be a part of. There are so many distractions today that would lead you to believe we live in a divided society. Yet here we are—about twenty random adults—offering one another mutual respect and simply, the ability to be.
The discussions and journaling portions require a lot of introspection and openness. Being more extroverted, I find the conversations incredibly stimulating. It has been almost ten years since I’ve been in a classroom environment and listened to lectures—and far longer since I’ve done so for eight hours straight! It’s more lecture-heavy than I anticipated, but I’m grateful for it. It’s reminding me that I can still do this “school” thing, this “learning” thing.
I had anticipated a more physical practice experience. We do a physical practice for sixty to ninety minutes max each day. Although it isn’t what I expected, like so many things in life, I think it may be exactly what I needed.
I’m currently perimenopausal and have been go-go-going for as long as I can remember as an adult. This moment of physical pause—combined with the mental stimulation of learning—is a refreshing paradigm shift for this season of my life. I feel as if I’m grasping the concepts easily… the Sanskrit, however, not as much. I thought I knew more than I do, which has been humbling.
Even the yoga poses surprised me. There are so many whose English names I didn’t know, and then to find that the same pose might have different English names depending on where you live! It’s comforting and intimidating all at once to realize that yoga is a forever-learning journey.
When I imagine teaching others, I sometimes feel daunted. But I keep reminding myself that I don’t have to know everything to get started—and that it’s okay to say, “I don’t know.” I don’t have to have all the answers.
Uncovering the many layers of yoga—and therefore yourself—is a deeply introspective journey. The one truth I continue to return to is this: give grace to yourself as freely as you do to others.
Grace is something I’m beginning to understand on a much deeper level. Studying the Yamas and Niyamas by Deborah Adele and reflecting on the deep questions she asks at the end of each chapter, as well as exploring the chakras, has been enlightening. I thought I had worked through many of these topics before—and I have, to an extent—but what I’m realizing is that there are always more layers, always deeper levels to reach.
This is life’s journey. Sometimes you feel on top of the world, and sometimes you don’t. Digging deeper can be uncomfortable, but if you sit in that discomfort and accept what arises—not with judgment, but with gentle observation—you can learn so much about yourself.
